George continued dancing, totally oblivious of the
death, until the porcupine jumped on him...
[spam]
and said : "George, be a nice guy and...
give me your wand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
In an unbelievable twist, the bishop/balrog
Pulled out a skateboard and started to practice kickflips...
In the previous episodes (approximately) :
*********************************************************************************
Once upon a time there was a Bishop that wanted to become a Queen. The Bishop would murder for his dream, but like every other piece he could only move to certain squares.
But suddenly he had an idea: he would kill the real Queen and take her place and rule forever except the other secret queen would return from exile. "The journey begins" he thought.
First he had to get past the devious knights with their dangerous tricks and traps. He waited until they left C3 and F3 for the day and travelled to china, in order to get help from some grandmasters, who instead convinced everyone along the way that murdering queens is not ok :-)
But one grandmaster objected to this, and his name was Sauron, he was a closet queen himself, when nobody would look, he would put on girls clothes. The idea of sacrificing a fellow queen gave him such an inexplicable pleasure that he couldn't just let the others have the same dream. Then he saw it Balrogs, Ents, Elves, Dwarves, Trolls and Goblins! He would make them all addicted to show tunes.
It had a curious effect on the planet, and it started to look like a disco hall. The Ents were dancing Gangnam style elves couldn't figure out how to tell the Balrog he couldn't build a snowman. But he built a Snowwoman instead and unwittingly set in motion the worst curse the 64 counties had ever known.
The Snowwoman came to life and started to chase everyone around with a wheelbarrow full of snow and a carrot.
THE END
"You cannot pass!" said the Queen and she morphed into Gandalf the Grey.
"Lady," said the Balrog to the Snowwoman, "are all those carrots made for desolation?"
"Firedude," said the Snowwoman to the Balrog, "carrots are only nails for pinning opponents."
"Dang," said the Balrog, "Don't pin me."
"Then pin me instead." replied the Snowwoman.
While these two were flirting, Gandalf-Queen burned them with an uber-cool saber, which didn't disturb the Balrog, but the Snowwoman screamed "I'M MELTING!!!". She jumped behind a big troll (whose name was seanysean) doing a triple backflip which quite impressed the elves, who ran into the bathroom and accidentally got trapped.
The Snowman (whom we shall now call The Puddle) thought : "well, i'm pinned now, badly.I've changed from snowwoman to man puddle!, but i can slide" said the puddle.
The transexual closet-Queen Grandmaster exclaimed, just before being exploded, "I was just being a trans to get attention!" He exploded into a million straight pieces.
Meanwhile, the elves in the bathroom were annoyed : there was only one cotton bud left.They called Elvis, so that he could bring the emergency burrito kit.
"No burrito!, i have mojitos instead, mates"
The elves started cleaning out their ears with the mint leaves, but they were allergic to them so they went deaf and could no longer hear the evil sounds of the Mojitos laughing at their demise.
And RANDY ORTON CAME OUT OF DAMN NOWHERE. John Cena was miffed at randy for having forgotten their romantic date. Elvis quickly googled Randy and John Cena and realized that their job was to strip and lay all over each other.
"Think about it", said the bishop while being weirded out.
He came in through the bathroom window and killed Elvis Presley.
"Ahhhhhh" says Elvis with his dying breath. He was then revived by Donald Trump. Elvis died on seeing Trump's face. This raised quite a conundrum for Hillary Clinton who later collapsed from pneumonia after she took a cold shower with Donald. Bill Clinton was furious so he exploded with rage and asked Hillary how she could be so unloyal to Hitler, and all his little pixies killed Hillary.
Then Bill offered a cigar to Donald, Donald refused, remembering what his mommy said:
"Bill always stuff cigars into troll's ass!", and spit on Bill.
Bill cried for days. he was offended.
A magical fairy appeared and gave beards to bald people so they could wear them on their heads. The bald guys ate the beards then realised their mistake and burst into rage, and gave Donald' scalp to our bishop, who slayed these bald men. Then with the scalp o' Donald he cooked himself a good breakfast, but he burnt the toast.
In an act of utter desperation he had haggis instead for his breakfast
And all of a sudden, a wild porcupine appeared from behind the table, and stabbed someone with the name of George Weasley. He reacted by slapping the porcupine and yowling in pain.George Measly then did a wee tap dance which made the bishop very jealous, so he became a Balrog and started to light Bill's cigar with his fiery whips.
And suddenly, he became dead.
George continued dancing, totally oblivious of the death, until the porcupine jumped on him and said : "George, be a nice guy and give me your wand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
In an unbelievable twist, the bishop/balrog pulled out a skateboard and started to practice kickflips, which was a perfect distraction for....
*********************************************************************************
Once upon a time there was a Bishop that wanted to become a Queen. The Bishop would murder for his dream, but like every other piece he could only move to certain squares.
But suddenly he had an idea: he would kill the real Queen and take her place and rule forever except the other secret queen would return from exile. "The journey begins" he thought.
First he had to get past the devious knights with their dangerous tricks and traps. He waited until they left C3 and F3 for the day and travelled to china, in order to get help from some grandmasters, who instead convinced everyone along the way that murdering queens is not ok :-)
But one grandmaster objected to this, and his name was Sauron, he was a closet queen himself, when nobody would look, he would put on girls clothes. The idea of sacrificing a fellow queen gave him such an inexplicable pleasure that he couldn't just let the others have the same dream. Then he saw it Balrogs, Ents, Elves, Dwarves, Trolls and Goblins! He would make them all addicted to show tunes.
It had a curious effect on the planet, and it started to look like a disco hall. The Ents were dancing Gangnam style elves couldn't figure out how to tell the Balrog he couldn't build a snowman. But he built a Snowwoman instead and unwittingly set in motion the worst curse the 64 counties had ever known.
The Snowwoman came to life and started to chase everyone around with a wheelbarrow full of snow and a carrot.
THE END
"You cannot pass!" said the Queen and she morphed into Gandalf the Grey.
"Lady," said the Balrog to the Snowwoman, "are all those carrots made for desolation?"
"Firedude," said the Snowwoman to the Balrog, "carrots are only nails for pinning opponents."
"Dang," said the Balrog, "Don't pin me."
"Then pin me instead." replied the Snowwoman.
While these two were flirting, Gandalf-Queen burned them with an uber-cool saber, which didn't disturb the Balrog, but the Snowwoman screamed "I'M MELTING!!!". She jumped behind a big troll (whose name was seanysean) doing a triple backflip which quite impressed the elves, who ran into the bathroom and accidentally got trapped.
The Snowman (whom we shall now call The Puddle) thought : "well, i'm pinned now, badly.I've changed from snowwoman to man puddle!, but i can slide" said the puddle.
The transexual closet-Queen Grandmaster exclaimed, just before being exploded, "I was just being a trans to get attention!" He exploded into a million straight pieces.
Meanwhile, the elves in the bathroom were annoyed : there was only one cotton bud left.They called Elvis, so that he could bring the emergency burrito kit.
"No burrito!, i have mojitos instead, mates"
The elves started cleaning out their ears with the mint leaves, but they were allergic to them so they went deaf and could no longer hear the evil sounds of the Mojitos laughing at their demise.
And RANDY ORTON CAME OUT OF DAMN NOWHERE. John Cena was miffed at randy for having forgotten their romantic date. Elvis quickly googled Randy and John Cena and realized that their job was to strip and lay all over each other.
"Think about it", said the bishop while being weirded out.
He came in through the bathroom window and killed Elvis Presley.
"Ahhhhhh" says Elvis with his dying breath. He was then revived by Donald Trump. Elvis died on seeing Trump's face. This raised quite a conundrum for Hillary Clinton who later collapsed from pneumonia after she took a cold shower with Donald. Bill Clinton was furious so he exploded with rage and asked Hillary how she could be so unloyal to Hitler, and all his little pixies killed Hillary.
Then Bill offered a cigar to Donald, Donald refused, remembering what his mommy said:
"Bill always stuff cigars into troll's ass!", and spit on Bill.
Bill cried for days. he was offended.
A magical fairy appeared and gave beards to bald people so they could wear them on their heads. The bald guys ate the beards then realised their mistake and burst into rage, and gave Donald' scalp to our bishop, who slayed these bald men. Then with the scalp o' Donald he cooked himself a good breakfast, but he burnt the toast.
In an act of utter desperation he had haggis instead for his breakfast
And all of a sudden, a wild porcupine appeared from behind the table, and stabbed someone with the name of George Weasley. He reacted by slapping the porcupine and yowling in pain.George Measly then did a wee tap dance which made the bishop very jealous, so he became a Balrog and started to light Bill's cigar with his fiery whips.
And suddenly, he became dead.
George continued dancing, totally oblivious of the death, until the porcupine jumped on him and said : "George, be a nice guy and give me your wand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
In an unbelievable twist, the bishop/balrog pulled out a skateboard and started to practice kickflips, which was a perfect distraction for....
Donald Trump as he was being inaugurated.
This allowed for the final plan to
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