how to escape the infernal spiral of rating and addiction to fast random games

I'm an honest person. In chess, I did something disastrous for myself in the past. I fell into a downward spiral, I confused chess and gaming and in the end, I became aware and got out of this hell. the name of this misfortune: the concern of the rating and also the addiction to fast random games

before telling you in detail my personal story and recommending what to do to avoid repeating the same mistakes as me, here is a summary of the regular situation for any amateur who sees a rating for the first time:

you feel proud. it's the first thing that happens to you when you first find out that you will have a rating, your ego takes over and you get adrenaline.
you feel unique because you are part of a large community and other people with whom you compare. and that's the problem.
The problem is To compare yourself to others.

because after a few games, the ego takes an excessive form, or you will have great confidence and the slightest defeat will break you, or you will lose confidence and you will anxiously play games one after the other. (but both examples can occur successively). and of course, you will lose. and if you win a single game in the middle of 10 losses, you will continue to play. and lose. to the point of being angry and raging. not because you lost. I bet you only remember the first and last losses of your streak. not other games. so why are you angry when the content of the games is not that bad? because you lost rating. you worry about a number that becomes an object of lust and desire and you continue to compare yourself to others

you have an addiction, when you say to yourself something like the - yet another game! or - come on, I'll win this one and I'll quit!

And you develop a feeling of frustration. you are naturally a perfectionist. we always want to do everything well so much that like a horse with blinders, you walk in front without seeing to the side. except that unlike the horse, no one forces you to wear blinders, you are your only master. then wake up. you're going to lose, so know how to withstand the crash test. it'll be OK.

that's how it started for me on the last day of August 2020. for me, chess is a sporting hobby, but at the time, it was a hobby. there were the lockdowns, the big passion for online board games. and since my early childhood, I have loved chess. and I discovered Lichess. and I, who know nothing other than how to move the pieces, having learned chess self-taught with a battery operated chessboard, I discover a new world and I feel honored to have a rating and to play against human opponents who are behind a screen like me and not with a battery-powered board.

fairy tale with the rating ends there.

I keep playing games, playing any variants or time control, and I can't stop because it's so fun and frustrating.

It could have disgusted me, but I found happiness in this frustration. Just because I am a perfectionist. and every day, I've looked at my rating, asking myself: what will happen to this rating in 10 minutes? and 1 hour later, I panicked, it went downhill. or I rejoice loudly (the “YES!” after each victory), it went up.

for 1 year, I played literally like that on Lichess. and it was destructive very quickly

why do I consider online chess rating to be more dangerous than OTB?

the main factor is the number of games.

as much in OTB, it is very much structured around tournaments, if you want to have a rating, you have to play tournaments. And these are tournaments with formats often favoring an equal number of games between participants of the same tournament (Swiss system, round robin), online we have such tournaments and even another type - arena, but the danger is random games. the difference with otb is that we have random rated games. and the danger is that it's harder to stop in random than in an Arena where you have a limited time or a Swiss system where you have a predefined number of games. There, you are the limit. and many people believe that this random is a gold mine for quickly gaining rating, but it is hell for your rating and you, especially with the fast time controls which can very quickly generate an addiction.

So, time control is the second factor.

Slow games require greater concentration than fast control times, and as a result, this generates greater mental and physical fatigue which often makes you think about the point of continuing rather than analyzing the freshly played game before pushing "start a new game".

Fast time controls certainly have significant advantages in keeping certain of your cognitive faculties active such as reflexes, rapid decision-making and analytical skills. but online and especially in random format, the danger is not knowing when to stop before arriving at an event brutal enough to disgust you like 200 rating points less, a broken mouse, a random insult that you say about yourself... and there, the rating loses its value and serves as only negative elements of comparison. and this is a problem that some people face: why I lost all this rating

because you don't tried to stop.

You are a perfectionist, but you need to set a limit.

Setting a limit means knowing how to give your best at a given moment and being conscious enough to tell yourself not to continue beyond a certain number of games. the advantage is that you will learn to be more precise on this precise number of games to try to win as much as possible, so you will improve. the other advantage is that if you set a reasonable limit for yourself (for example 15 bullet games per day), you will not have an addiction since you have a limit and you can freely exceed this limit for a important event like a marathon or a shield. another piece of advice is that rather than setting a limit to be respected exactly, set a maximum number of games not to exceed, and play the number of games you want provided you do not exceed this limit. if for example you choose to play 20 bullet games per day but you don't have the strength that day, you can play 10 games but in any case not 21, even if you feel good.

Tips to think better about rating

That's the tips i used to became better and then, i stopped to carrying about the rating.
And since this day, I'm not more addicted. I take pleasure to play. You can do it to !

1. set a limit number of games not to be exceeded but play freely on the sole condition of not exceeding this number (except in special conditions such as an important tournament)

2. avoid playing too often in random but favor tournaments, which have a fixed duration.

3. prepare yourself mentally and educate yourself: the rating is a comparison tool, of course, but with a positive aim, establishing and theorizing the approximate strength of each player to make tournament pairings and national rankings simpler.

4. the rating is not an end in itself, as the rating is mobile and dependent on your performance, it is approximate. never panic or consider yourself inferior, because this number can and will move.

5. consider the rating as evolving and look at it to see your progress or your poor performance, this will help you see if it depends on a period where you did not concentrate on chess or if you played a longer time control 'another.

Bonus tips : avoid at all costs any value judgment on yourself or others, and prioritize the content of the game as well as the quality of your opponent's game without thinking about their rating. this will be positive for you and your progress !

Play chess, have fun, see you soon !

*Every images of this blog are from Pexels.