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Dumb ways to fail in chess and how to do it!

1. f3 e5 2. Kf2?! d5 3. Kg3??

Headless Horseman or Hara-Kiri opening, as it implies that White will almost always lose. The "purpose" is to bring the king out for an early endgame.
Here is an example of a game with the Headless Horseman Opening! (Though this opening is not classified in any openings yet, but I classify it as an opening... of suicide, but playable and entertaining)

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