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Corrupt-a-wish Game

Granted.

You have the amazing hearing of a cat. Unfortunately, you watched a meme video, got earraped, and are now deaf forever.
Granted.
You are now a cat. Your owner wuvs you and feeds you every yummy treat. It turns out that you are particularly partial to cream and goose liver patè. You put on stacks of weight, but your owner, blinded by your overall cuteness, is oblivious to the problem!
Your stomach outgrows your legs and you become a youtube sensation. You are seriously embarrassed by your predicament. Things go from bad to worse when your owner starts dressing you as his favourite characters from an anime series about 5 schoolgirls called 'Team Candyfloss Love Pink!'

I wish I wasnt so lazy

( I still feel good thinking the Socceroos are winning the World Cup even if Im dead)
🙆
(Well, your grandchildren and/or great-grandchildren have a chance to see the final^^. Dang!, my cat life is a nightmare!^^)

Granted.
You're now a work addict, afternoon nap is barely a distant memory and bumming around has become a sacrilege. Even having a good time with your friends at the restaurant becomes impossible because you can't help serving and dishwashing, wich usually gets on the nerves of the owner. Soon, you have time for nobody, and your friends and even your familly turn away from you.
Seeing in you the incarnation of Stakhanov myth, your boss makes you work 20 hours a day and you make him very rich. When you die of exhaustion, he generously offers a marble stele to your familly where the following epitath is engraved :" In the loving memory of KateKidna, who died for the perenniality of his compagny."

I wish i was more patient.
Granted.

Someone kidnaps you, takes you to their basement, and acts like you are in the hospital when you wake up. Because you don't know that you are kidnapped, the person tells you to "be patient" and leaves the room. Because of how patient you are, you wait and wait and wait, and the person never comes down there again. You die of thirst in a week because of your patience.

I wish I wasn't depressed anymore.
Granted.
You are no longer depressed and now feel GREAT; full of confidence and energy. The world seems full of amazing opportunities. Everything seems so appealing and so achivevable that you just can't decide what to aim for first. You are ironically stuck at home unable to act because of indecision. You cannot even become depressed by your terrible predicament.

I wish I was eating a chocolate pudding
Granted.

You are eating a chocolate pudding.
Suddenly, you ate it all.
lik if u cri evrtim ;-;

I wish I had a portal gun.
Granted.

You accidently point the gun at your true love and send her to a alternate universe and spend the rest of your life searching the galaxy for her...

I wish for love...
Wish granted.

You get love, but from a girl that saw you walking down the street one day. She immediately falls in love with you to a scary point. She gets so jealous that she doesn't even like it when people look at you. She starts killing everybody you know, including the girl you like (a slow and painful death), your friends, your family. Everybody. Now you wake up in a locked room with no windows. She kidnapped you. You will be hers and hers forever. You are forced to love her.

I wish to have psychic powers.
Wish granted
You go around using these powers for all to see, the authorites quickly determine that you are a threat to national security. They send those with the darkest auras and minds to visit you, and you quickly begin to absorb their minds. You are driven to insanity, by overexposure to the darkest minds that humanity has to offer; commiting suicide a year later.

I wish to get promoted to a high enough rank at work to, fire my boss.

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